Moving across the country on a low budget is a royal pain in the ass. And the logistics of such are putting a mild damper on my excitement. It’s more epic frustration than woe is me bullshit.
I’m about as frustrated as a crackwhore without any crack or whorish shenanigans.
I’m about as frustrated as a woman in the throes of heightened sexual tension without a partner to take it out on.
I’m about as frustrated as a politician without a Lewinsky.
I’m about as frustrated as the CIA without a brothel.
I’m about as frustrated as. As. Uhm. As someone who is frustrated.
(I just reread this and realized most of the the frustration examples are sexual in nature. Don’t read into that, please. Or do. Either way, I’m gonna stop talking now. (Except I’m not. But it won’t be about sex anymore. Why would I talk about sex? This is a motherfucking clean blog, damnit. (Fuckin’ hell, I have sex on the brain. I’m human after all. Sexbrain is NOT HELPING, SO MOTHERFUCKING STOP IT, BRAIN. (I really should delete this ridiculous parenthetical that’s only making things worse. But I’m not going to. Because this is me. Hi. My name is Stephanie, and I have sexbrain. Hi Stephanie. Welcome, Stephanie. Keep coming back – it works if you work it!))))
It’s all a buncha bullshit. And there’s a whole lotta bullshit that has to be figured out and sorted.
Buncha Bullshit that has to be Figured Out and Sorted
Emotional Bullshit – Let’s get this bullshit outta the way first. My family sucks. Seriously, they can all go eat a giant bag of dicks. I don’t know where my mother is. She may or may not be in town. I’ve seen both her and my sort of grandfather at local grocery stores before. They both ignored me. Pretended I wasn’t even there. It’s no wonder grocery stores are currently my strongest triggers for acute anxiety. But the mother…is unreliable and an untreated bipolar. And she’s probably not even in the state anymore. Who knows. My siblings and my aunt (who was always my second-favorite family member – at least on that side of the family) won’t speak to me anymore, because I won’t “get over” the physical, emotional, psychological, sexual abuse and go to my so-called father’s side now as he lays dying.
So yeah. Fuck them. I’m not even gonna tell them I’m leaving. For all they know, I’ve been dead for years. Fuck. Them. Fuck. Them. Fuck. Them. And for all the Fuck Thems I type, there are a hundred more tears. Motherfuckers. Fuck Them for making me feel this way. Fuck them for throwing me out with yesterday’s garbage. Fuck Them. I don’t even love them anymore. Do I? Fuckin’ hell, I’ve gotten scary good at compartmentalization. Don’t get me wrong. I know I can’t run away from the damage they’ve done to me over the course of my life. (This is not about running away. This is about moving on to a place I’ve always wanted to be but allowed people to tell me no.) And though I can’t get them outta my head, I can get outta this town of pain and tangible memories.
Whew. There. That’s dealt with. Let’s move on to financial bullshit.
Financial Bullshit – I know I haven’t spoken about my (failed) marriage, and I don’t intend to go into details now. At this point, it’s not something I wish to speak of here. I bring it up now just to make a single point: I was unemployed when we separated. But I was the one left saddled with the entire mortgage and anything else that goes into the typical running of a household. Since he took half of the savings account, it didn’t take long for me to go through every cent as I looked for a job in a shitty economy and shitty area for good employment opportunities. By the time I landed something decent, aside from little temp jobs, I had about 200 bucks to my name. And I seriously thought I was going to go default on the mortgage. I didn’t. In fact, I’ve never missed a single payment. But what that means for me now? I don’t have savings. I have some cash stashed in a box where all of my tutoring cash goes. But it’s “nothing to write home about,” as the saying goes. I’m fine. I pay all of my bills (except the student loan one which I simply can’t pay at this point). And they’re paid on time. I don’t do without food, water, shelter, books, etc. So I work full-time for an enormous corporation, and I’m broke. But only when it comes to anything outside of the basics.
However, this does throw a big wrench into the logistics of moving across country. Do y’all know how much it would cost to hire a moving company to move one set of bedroom furniture, about twenty boxes of books, some dishes and a couple of chests? The lowest quote I’ve gotten thus far was about $3,500. Their competitors said $4,500. U-Haul would be about $1,700, but then there is mileage and fuel costs to consider on top of that. So. What it looks like I’ll have to do is drive myself up there with my cats and whatever I can fit in the car. Leave the rest in storage. And sleep on an air mattress in the tiniest, cheapest apartment I can find to start out in.
This also means that I can’t afford to let people at work know about this until the very last minute. Because I can’t afford to quit my job while I tidy up the house for the market and dig in deep on a job search in Seattle. It also means I can’t just move up there and find a job that way, because I’d have greater odds of landing something good if I were actually there. But I can’t do that.
Then there’s the question of where I’ll live in the interim.
Housing Bullshit – As the regular Peopleaneous know, I’m in the (lengthy) process of preparing my house to put on the market. This involves the ex, as his name is still on the deed. And the house is filled with a lot of his stuff. (Including the guns that I couldn’t get rid of, because they weren’t mine…and I did not want to deal with the explosion that would ensue if I’d gotten rid of them.) So. He’s been over a lot on weekends and evenings. Going through his stuff. Culling stuff. Fixing stuff (very very slowly) and occasionally sabotaging my efforts by doing shit like parking in the middle of the yard after days of heavy rain and rutting the fucker up. That will do wonders for the curb appeal. Fucking wonderful. Anyway. ANYFUCKINGWAY. This isn’t about him. And I said I didn’t wanna talk about him. And I don’t. So. The point is, this is lengthy.
And I have an issue that I don’t know how to resolve.
Issue the First: Selling the house is going to be difficult. First, the market it is in has done nothing but go down down down since I/we bought the place. Second, he never maintained things. And I wasn’t allowed to, in the sense that… No. No. I’m just gonna leave that there. I’m not going to make this about him. He used to be great, and then he lost his way. And then we both changed. I’m gonna leave it at that. Point is, the house wasn’t kept up. Things are broken. Things are damaged. Things have been neglected. Then the other day, the fucking city tore down a tree. Fucking ass sucking dickwhistles. And in the few years I’ve been there by myself, I was mostly so mired down in a bottomless pit of the darkest depression I’ve known. Too far down to even think it was worth getting out of bed to take care of the house. I was in total fuck you, fuck me, fuck the world, fuck the universe, fuck the house, fuck the job, fuck it all mode.
Issue the Second: What if the house sells before I land a job in Seattle? Does that mean I have to sign a 6-month contract on some apartment in town? That would make me lose a lot of money if I found a job just after moving. Plus, who the fuck wants to move twice?
Issue the Third: What if I land a job before the house sells? How do I finagle that? I can’t afford to rent property in Seattle while simultaneously paying a mortgage. Seriously, it’s not like I’m CEO material. I won’t be making that kinda money. So how does that work?
Which leads me to jobby bullshit.
Jobby Bullshit – Should I even be looking for jobs at this point? Is it premature? It’s premature, isn’t it? Wouldn’t it be foolish not to? Maybe someone out there thinks I’m worth waiting for. It’s possible, right? Or maybe I could land a job and let them know that when the house sells, I’ll need to fly back down for paperwork and shit. But that brings me back to the issue of rent plus mortgage. No can do, buckaroo. The good news is that I’ve secured three solid references. Two of you read this blog on occasion. Be good to me, fellas! Pretty please.
Oh, yes. More Jobby Bullshit. Another issue I’m having is that I’d like to pursue something that I may actually enjoy. Something with writing or editing would be fucking epic. I can even write without using “fuck” all the time. Promise. The problem is, my degrees are not in English or Journalism or any of those other “required” degrees for writing jobs. The problem is none of my work experience is writing related, aside from some freelance gigs on the side. The problem is, I don’t have writing samples to submit. And I sure as fuck don’t want any potential employers finding this spot: a. because of all the fucking that goes on around here and 2. because then I’d never be able to rant or vent about work!
But I don’t want to do the kind of thing I’m doing right now. And I also don’t want to do the whole Executive Assistant/Administrative thing. I’ve done it. I’m damn fucking good at it. But it’s no fun. It’s draining. It’s meaningless to me. And it makes me feel the time, my life, tick tick ticking away.
~
So I don’t know what to do. More specifically, I don’t know how to approach all of this. I’m sure there are other issues that I had in mind before I began this post. But I’ve been interrupted countless times because work. And also because my mind is in a dirty, dirty place right now. So it’s hard to focus. Anyway, this fucker is nearly 2,000 words already. Probably about 1,900 more than it really needs to be! But my name is not Concisephanie for a reason!
I would like to ask something of my dear Peopleaneous.
If there are any of you out there who have done this before and have a clearer vision on the logistics of something like this, please hit me up. I’d love some advice.
If there are any of you out there who have made major career switches without the official qualifications to do so, I’d love some tips there as well.
And if any of you are in Seattle and hiring, pick me! MEMEMEMEMEME!
In the meantime, I’m going to keep trudging forward. This is my year. I’m taking charge of my life. And I’m still holding on to Rollins’ words.
GO!
(Please forgive any egregious errors. I don’t feel like re-reading this right now. Ha! Some copy-editor!)
I live in Seattle(area), but am bad at the job thing. I don’t know anyone that is hiring, but if I did I would hire you. Also, I don’t know where you are coming from, but it is pretty expensive to live here. Only a few places are more expensive (the upper east coast, San Fran, LA and a few others, but it is so expensive here.) Anyways, good luck on all those exhausting first world problems. Mine are even more first persony.
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Haha! I know – I’ll have to land something good to be able to do it. I’ve looked at basic rent prices and HOTFUCKINGDAM. I’m in Louisiana, so yeah. Bit of a difference there.
Oh just hire me anyway. I’m fucking awesome!
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Oh man are you in for a sticker shock. Louisiana is so much cheaper.
I will just start a gif making company and hire you to write funny captions for them.
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I know – I’ve looked and the cheapest hovel apartment is twice my mortgage payment. Ha!
I wanna write funnies!
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The only reason we are able to live here is we inherited our house from my mother in law after living with her and taking care of her for 1o years. We are like the poorest people that could ever possibly live here. We’ve always wanted to sell our house here and move somewhere cheaper so we could get a nicer house with more space for the kids to run around in.
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That’s certainly a unique set of circumstances.
Why don’t you? Sell and move, I mean? Just life getting in the way? Or more pros than cons?
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Can’t get a job anywhere. Either too lazy or people don’t realize the amazing potential of my amazingness.
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Definitely the latter! 😀
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I am awesome, people just don’t know it, so I have to tell them…to visit my blog.
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I’ll tell them!
Ben is awesome, everyone!
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Finally a town crier for me! I need to get you a megaphone to use in downtown Seattle.
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Yeah, and I could throw in some shitty jokes and see if I get some coins in my hat!
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I just remembered that we have a shed out back that could technically be cleaned out and used as at least a bedroom. Though we would have to get some insulation and a kitchen and bathroom, we could possibly accommodate you out there so you could tell jokes downtown every day!
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Dude, I’m down with the shed. Hashtag shedlife. 😀
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We live by the woods to, so you are welcome to use the facilities there, and build campfires for food.
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I DON’T EAT CAMPFIRES! WHAT KIND OF HEATHEN DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?
Wait.
On second thought.
Is it hardwood or softwood?
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You would not believe how good the firewood tastes out here. Plus if you get some graham crackers, marshmellows and chocolate, you could do some S’mores for desert.
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EW I don’t like S’mores. (I know, I know. SHE’S UNAMERICAN!)
I guess I’ll just have to stick with the wood to sate my appetite.
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S’mores aren’t for everyone, some people just like sticks and stones.
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Omnomnom.
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I’ve picked up and left before, yes. Went to New Orleans for a Grateful Dead show…then stayed. Came back long enough to get my tiny amount of possessions and took off. But I didn’t own a house, especially with an ex, and I could move all I had in and/or on top of a Jeep Cherokee. It’s a bit different a scenario, yes, but the picking up and leaving is not regretted…ONE BIT! It’s complicated for you, obviously. But you don’t know if you don’t try. That Henry Rollins quote just about sums it up. All I’m saying is, don’t freak yourself out before even going. Be rational, not scared.
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Thank you! Seriously, thank you lots. Just a few minutes ago my third reference (that I was scared to ask because she knows my boss) emailed and asked me to call her tomorrow morning. Apparently, she has some connections in Seattle. It may go NOWHERE, but at least she’s a solid reference. She was even excited about it.
I wish the complications weren’t here, but they are vestiges of what was so it can’t be helped. I’m totally going for it. The challenges WILL be overcome, and I’ll be the stronger for it. It’s just frustrating getting there! 🙂
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Sounds to me like you need to rethink the abrupt transition to the Pacific Northwest. Go totally “Dave Ramsey” live on rice and beans, deliver pizzas on your off time, and financially regroup. A year of total commitment to reestablishing yourself would make the move plausible and much more stress free.
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I know, I know. I’ve thought about it. I’ve lived on ramen before for a long time. I tutor after hours in my time off. I’ve been putting off the transition for years. It’s like…an abrupt transition that has been put off for years. If that makes sense.
It will depend on the job situation. If I land something perfect, that will make it easy. If not, then I obviously will have to ride it out for a while. 🙂
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No Ramen. That’ll kill you. Beans and rice. Cheap, and good. Make sure you have some fresh veggies too. But definitely cut down on the frills. It is expensive here, but the pay is good too. So you have that to look forward to. You have enough education and experience that you should be able to land something.
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I have rice in abundance. You and your beans. I know they’re nutritious, though. And full of protein.
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Cheap protein.
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Among other cheap proteins.
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DUDE!
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EXACTLY!
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I’ve not much advice to offer, but here are a couple of thoughts.
Getting away and severing contact with an abusive family has been one of the single best decisions that I ever made. In the years to come you might wax nostalgic,but the transformations that you can make away from their influence will far exceed any neurotic scraps of familial attention.
Also, just a notion, considering the equity you’ll lose in selling your house would renting be a better option or a bigger headache? It might be something worth looking into. In any event, good luck.
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Thank you so much for that perspective. It makes me so hopeful to hear that it did you so well to sever contact for good.
I’ve seriously considered renting the house out. My only concern is that if something came up, needed repairs for instance, I’d be across the country. Perhaps I should look a bit more deeply into it.
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You could hire a property manager. If you could still take a large enough cut.
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I dunno if that’s a good idea. I’ve been here for such a short period of time (like 6 years) that I think I have little to no equity. They frontload the most interest in the first several years’ payments. I’ll check. But I think I’m kinda fucked on the house.
It’ll be aight.
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Well, I don’t like that. Maybe worth looking into.
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It’ll be alright.
I looked into my mortgage account. And there’s no way I’ll lose all the equity. Some, yes. But I should at least do better than breaking even.
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Hoorah!!!
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You’re much tinier and blacker and toothier than I’d imagined, but look how strong you are, breaking that pencil like an itty bitty twig 😉
Ugh. Well, YES I did know how much it costs to have movers take your stuffs cross country. I have friends who have done it. I know more who hitchhiked, motorcycled, or took a bus with like, nothing but a serious backpack.
We did the 4-state-move twice. I prepped the house. It was horrible to the nth. I had two kids and two toddlers and no husband while I did it. We weren’t able to sell our house before we moved, but we did find a company to rent it while it was for sale. Not too shabby. Only took a few months, cost a coupla hundred dollars, and we made no profit on the house whatsoever.
But we were SO happy when we got there. We had more room, more money, made some incredible memories, met wonderful people.
When we moved back, we had saved a lot of shiny pennies, no vacations, no lots of things, for years, so we’d be able to buy a home. We moved into The Mister’s parents’ house in March and he didn’t find a job until June and that job didn’t start until July. We bought our house in August. We hadn’t actual planned to live here permanently. He’d hunted for jobs both here and the other city, and took the first one that paid him enough to support us. He separated from the Army, so it’s not like he was going to run HR or drive the commander in civilian world…
Total life change.
It was stressful. Every day. It all worked out and life is good, but at the time, for those few months, we were so incredibly stressed. We had gobs of money, a secure roof over our heads, and it was still really, really stressful not knowing how things would pan out. Also, the situation makes one sound a bit flaky. Knowing nothing. People asked questions and I’d be all, “I dunno. I dunno. I dunno.” I blogged about it plenty.
But, Stephanie. We love our life. Our life is very happy here. It was SO worth the move and all the sacrifices that went with it.
When you need a change, make the change, hm? That’s what you’re doing. It’s a process.
When I think about doing it as a single person without kids, it makes me feel a bit giddy. It would still be stressful, but exciting, too, yeah? I don’t know that I’d move where it’s more expensive. I would have trouble with my pennies…
I do know some people for whom a small furnished apartment was provided, and even people whose moving expenses were comped, so I’d say yes, when you get your house on the market, get job huntin.
I have had a job NOT in my field. It was all about knowing someone. It was an awesome job for about 7 months. Then it wasn’t. If you’re hopeful in meeting someone who can hire you because you’re intelligent, well-spoken, and hygienic, I recommend you start off somewhere you meet a lot of professional people every day — restaurant, bar, bank.
Also, on the personal crap: Fuck all those motherfuckers.
And I’ve been typing this so long that now my banana bread is done. My word. I hope that was helpful. 🙂
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Tiny, black and toothy, yes. Imagine the havoc I wreak in pockets! 😉
Joey, for real. You are completely awesome and generous to share your positive experiences with me. It’s oh so stressful, and I’m only in the very early beginning stages of it. But I’m also SO fucking excited.
I haven’t felt hope and excitement in years. The good thing is, in spite of my recent upswing in spirits, I know this isn’t me being hasty or rash. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do, but held myself back from. So I’m finally trying to go for it.
It helps so much to hear about what you and your family went through and how you did it. I AM concerned about moving somewhere that’s gonna easily be twice as expensive to live as where I am now. Which makes landing the right job absolutely imperative.
I got some (potentially) super good news from my most recent reference. She MAY have connections up that way. Not sure yet, but she asked me to call her first thing in the morning. So you bet your sweet ass I’m a’gonna!
😀
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Oh good! I feel like this change will be so positive for you 🙂 Best of luck!
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Thank you!!
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I was five months pregnant and I sent my husband to New Zealand to find a job. He was there for three months and found nothing. He had to come back because he only had a the month visitors via, but the second week he was back, he got an interview. They did the interview on Skype, and he was offered the job. Then he had to break the news that I was due in six weeks. I told him to just go. Take the job. He told the guy who interviewed him that he was willing to miss the birth of our daughter to start working there. The guy said, “No way. You stay there for the birth of your baby, we will keep the job open for you. You come when you are ready.”
He left South Africa when out baby was two weeks old, and we joined him nine weeks later. Best move ever 😉 You know, aside from us separating now… But we are all good
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WOW – that’s a kickass story, Lola! And it makes me even more hopeful that shit like this can work out. I know it DOES work out for people – but it’s so far out of my comfort zone that I suspect only the meds are keeping me from shitting coathangers with anxiety. 😀
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Haha haha! Shitting coathangers! That’s hilarious, and provides one with quite a visual!!!!
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Haha! I didn’t even think about it…its been in my vocabulary for so long!!! 😂
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I U-Haul’ed it across the country when I moved to Seattle. It will cost you about $3,000 to do that, because you’ll need safe/secure places to sleep and your vehicle will eat a lot of gas when its hauling the extra weight. Plus, food and such. Not to mention the cost of packing materials. So the $3,500 estimate is a really good deal and if you want to keep all your stuff, it’s the most hassle-free.
Re: Keeping Stuff ~ I brought a bunch with me and it wasn’t worth it. In retrospect I should have sold everything and packed light. I would have had more cash on hand (which HELLO, Seattle is expensive!) and it would have been easier to build from scratch in a new place. (Especially because I’m like the Queen of Secondhand and I rock the “good deal” shopping.) But that’s me.
Not sure what your neighborhood is like, but if your house is in need of repairs and you are in need of moving, you might consider contracting with a property management company and get it in good enough shape to RENT (as opposed to sell) and wait out the market while essentially allowing that house to pay for itself as you get established in WA. But FYI: Rent prices out here – for a hovel – are about what a mortgage on a decent 3-4 bedroom house costs in the American southeast.
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I know – there’s no way in hell I can move up there without landing the right job. I’d be back down here in a heartbeat. I’m gonna need to double my current salary – which frankly isn’t saying much. It’s difficult to find jobs that pay what you’re worth down here.
The cheapest rent I’ve found – just looking briefly and superficially – is twice my current mortgage payment. And yes, it looked hovelish.
A property management company is a great idea. I figured to rent it out, I’d have to do it on my own and deal with repairs and such from afar. I’m DEFINITELY looking into that option. Thank you!
I wish I knew how to drive a U-Haul. I know I could do alright in one of the smaller ones, but dragging the car would freak me out. I’d only need one of the smaller ones. Seriously, bedroom furniture and some boxes and clothes. I donated nearly all of my clothes, tons of books, most of my dishes, etc. I have an elliptical I’m gonna sell. I think I can get about $500 for it. That will help, too.
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You could get one of the U-Haul trailers maybe… Supposedly they can be hauled by any vehicle. The small ones are big enough to accommodate bedroom furniture.
Definitely sell any/every thing you can. Depending on what job you land, there is the possibility of them assisting with relocation for up to 90 days, which would give you some breathing space. But that’s iffy.
I know people who have contracted their properties through management companies. From what I gather, they interviewed three potentials then decided on one. In your situation (being an absentee owner), it may be tempting to go with whoever is cheapest, but in practical terms you want the most bang for your buck. Real estate offices are a good starting point if you need referrals. Good luck!
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Oh hell, I didn’t even think about the little trailers ones that could be towed! That’s a pretty awesome idea, actually. I think I could cull down some more of my books and possibly make that work.
Thank you for the real estate tips, too. Lord knows I need all the tips I can get!!!!
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Ok. Here’s some nonsense advice.
1. Space from toxic family did wonders for me. Especially if you have a person you’re close with who is supportive and will advocate for you when you feel sucked in. You know the old saying, “Thank God we choose our friends because Satan chooses our family” or something like that. (I adapted it for me)😜
2. If you agree with number #1 and you’ve found a potential someone who will be supportive, then put your crap in storage, find a good property manager, rent your house, live in the crap part of Seattle with roommates working temp until you get a job, and be fucking happy, Stephanie!
3. Are you over complicating things? Why? Why are are over complicating thngs???
4. Safety first. Phycially, emotionally, psychologically. Get to safety, girl. You deserve it.
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You’re the best, Cheeky woman! And yes, I’ve certainly found some keepers here. People like you who help me through, and I’m so grateful.
I like to overcomplicate things! It’s a problem! I call it analysis paralysis! 😀
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Breath!
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Hahaha! Good idea!
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We love you Steph!
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I don’t have the greatest of advice, but I wish nothing but the best for you. As you well know.
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Thank you…I know…thank you… 🙂
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It’s not very nice of your mother to do that. I am positively aghast! You hang in there, girl!
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Thank you so so much!
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You are brave and you deserve a hug.
*hug*
I wish I had some other advice to offer.
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ditto. best of luck, steph! you are so brave for doing the right thing for yourself. I know how hard it is to get away from an abusive family. It took me 33 yrs, but I’ve never looked back!
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Thank you so much – this really means a lot to me. I’m glad you got away, too. This is long overdue for me.
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*HUGS* Thank you, Eric. 🙂
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I’m going through a lot myself
I haven’t dumped
Because I’ve been so busy
Change is never easy
Point a and point b
Never line up
If you want this bad enough
You will find your way
Stay focused
Sheldon
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Thank you so much, dear Sheldon.
Hang in there (sounds so cliche…fuck…).
We can do this, Sheldon.
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As a former Human Resources Manager – first and foremost continue to job hunt. It is not a bad thing to interview and have an expectation of a start date in your mind that gives you an opportunity to sell the house and move. Just make sure that is aired out rather quickly so expectations are set on both sides.
In regards to selling your house, you may have to short sell it if you have a condensed timeline. There is no immediate penalty but there will be tax implications next year as anything the bank has to write off will be taxable as income.
The only “advice” I would give is make sure that all of this isn’t due to a purely emotional reaction. Perhaps a simple pro/con list will help organize your thoughts!
No matter what, wishing you the best! Take care!
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I can guarantee it isn’t purely emotional. HOWEVER, a simple little pro/con T-chart wouldn’t hurt AT ALL. In fact, I’m gonna do that.
Also, your advice is valuable. And I really REALLY appreciate it. Makes me feel better about continuing the job hunt this “early” in the game, too.
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Glad I can help!
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“At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” ~ Lao-Tzu
Thinking of you and wishing you the best. Take care!
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THANK YOU so so much – and I love that quote. Thank you.
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You’re welcome. 😊 So happy you liked the quote. 🙂 💛 xo
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Hi Steph, I moved and drove from NY to Houston and did it on the fly. the cost of living there is nothing in comparison. I went for school and had not found a place and bounced a bit. When I was married, we planned to move to LA and her job was corporate and they have offices everywhere and she could transfer and for me, work would have increased.
My sister is an Atty and moved to NC and she made several trips and ultimately wasted a boatload of money. In her instance she had to in order to get accepted in the bar there. For all of her planning she did not secure a job and they were paying a 3rd of what she was making here. Her husband never lasted at a job but could get one doing menial stuff at the time. She took a huge loss on the house, spent 15k in moving and after no work in several months she ate it and moved back here, costing more.
So, I would definitely put out feelers, obviously see if the job you have now and do not like, happen to have jobs offered in Seattle and if it will be beneficial. You said you work at a huge company, you never mentioned, do they have a division in Seattle? If they do, before you leave see if you could transfer, I know you do not like it but perhaps in a better situation, you might.
As far as writing goes and any material to be shown for that kind of job. You mentioned you freelance, mention that and do something many people do here. Get a second blog, a pg one that you write sparingly and news related stuff. Then you would have something else to submit though many jobs in that arena offer online jobs and you could certainly start looking. Start if you can while here at a part time gig and when you move, if you have nothing else ask to bump it up to full time.
Any of this can buy you some time and maybe, if lucky, a whole lot more.
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Thanks for the tips – and that second blog idea is fucking epic! So I could do all the fucking over there and all the boring newsy stuff over there. HAHA!
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I may do the same as a second blog as I have a royal pain in the ass to deal with.
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Best of luck to you on this move! Hoping you can find a job that includes writing and editing. Don’t worry about not having a writing-related degree. As someone who’s spent most of his career answering a phone in a real-estate office, I’m proof positive that a writing-related degree is worthless. You’ve clearly got the chops.
Just be sure not to use the word “fuck” in your cover letter, and you should be good. 🙂
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Bahahaha! Thank you so much. Don’t worry, no fucking in the fucking cover letter. 😉
Sucks, doesn’t it? I have a Liberal Arts degree, too. And it’s not much better than toilet paper and loans I can’t repay. WOO!
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Hey! I told you to get Astroturf. Not my fault my car is too heavy for your lawn! 😛
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Oi! Least you could do is fix that shit. Then maybe I’d take you with me to Seattle. 😉
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Sploosh!
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Hey, watch where you aim that thing!
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Sending luck to you in your ventures, Steph! Never moved across country, but I did switch careers. I spent over 15 yrs as an IT pro, but I really, really wanted to get out of that. I really, really like writing. The natural destination was technical writing. I had no schooling for technical writing except for one night class I took because my old employer paid for most of it. (I was going to take another class, then I found out they cut the education budget without telling us).
I had writing samples from my stint as an IT pro, and I now have a job as a technical writer at a software company (‘course my IT background helped. A lot.). Love it! So, as someone else said, use some of your freelance work as samples. Depending on the job you’re applying to, you might be able to write a “practice” sample to use.
Good luck!
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Thank you so much, Julie – this is incredibly helpful and I am so grateful!
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My thoughts on this:
Find a job first, advise them you will need to move. Once you have found the job, you can start looking at places to live, and create a budget. I can help you figure out what would be a reasonable commute from wherever you plan to live, and find the best prices within those reasonable commutes. It’s not all about Seattle. Especially on the North End, if you have a job that is not south, I could find you a better place for the money outside city limits. The prestige of a Seattle address is at a premium. Either way, the area is still expensive, but also pays higher.
Also, you need to know that it is, “Go eat a giant bag of Dick’s” here, and it is not an insult.
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Echoing Josh here: Proximity to work is key, and you can get more bang for your buck outside of Seattle city limits. I’m a bit of a north-end snob, so I’m *not* gonna advocate for Tukwila or Kent or Roy (south of Seattle drudgey towns), but I’m doubting you’ll be working down there anyway. I’ve moved farther and farther north over the years, and have learned which areas have everything at your fingertips and which ones are crawling with vermin (mostly of the human variety). I’m happy to share my two cents after you and Josh put your heads together.
One thing that blew me away when I moved here was that 15 miles does NOT equal a 15 minute commute. It can take up to 90 minutes. Because, traffic from the 7th level of hell. So living opposite of the direction of traffic makes a huge difference. You want to be moving in the direction that everybody else ISN’T when you’re commuting.
Oh. And, Dick’s: http://www.ddir.com
(In case you worried that northwesterners were overly enthusiastic about fellatio.)
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Hahaha! So you really can get a big bag of Dick’s. 😀
You’re absolutely right about commuting issues and how I would feel about it. I do NOT want to live my life outside work behind the wheel of a car, stuck in traffic hell.
Thank you so much for offering your two cents and advice – I can use all the help I can get!
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Yeah I’m all about being outside the city limits. If I can finagle that, it would be ideal – as long as I don’t spend all of my off-work time commuting.
And…thank you, Josh. 🙂
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Well keep mind, outside the city limits is still urban.
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I know. I know. Yuck.
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I’m sure it will all work out for you, even if it doesn’t seem like it right now. Look into renting or selling your home first. If you rent your home, it’s extra income for you. At the same time, start looking for jobs in Seattle. Apply for writing jobs if that’s what you really want to do. I know it’s a lot to go through at once. Moving always sucks ! Try to handle everything one thing at a time so you don’t feel so overwhelmed. I have some family who aren’t so great too. It’s much better since I cut them out of my life. I know it hurts having to do it but it’s better in the long run. You’re going to be alright, just do one step at a time and have faith it will be alright.
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Thank you so much, Lisa. This is practical and valuable advice, and I really appreciate it!
And moving DOES suck!
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It will be alright! 🙂
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Crikey Mikey, you have a lot of shit going on over there at the moment. It is almost a chicken and the egg with the house, the move the job etc etc.
Do you have any employment agencies that can take the strain of solving the jobs situation this allowing you to remain in your home town until the last minute? Likewise any realtors that could move your house on now, give you what equity there is in the place and then you high tail it to Seattle with all of your clobber, rent a place and get a job?
It is all very round and round the situation you are in so I do hope you get there in the end Steph. If you need to talk just remember I am here to listen and to help if I can.
Take care friend.
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Oh yes, much much going on at the same damn time! Plus more changes at the job I’m currently at that make me wanna spit nails. So don’t let me loose near any nails, or people are goin’ down I say!
Hm. I have thought about looking into a recruiter. One of my references is going to be down this way sometime mid-March and wants to go to dinner to discuss prospects. I think he may have contacts up that way. Blergh.
Oh well, anything worth having is worth working hard and fighting for, eh? 🙂
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You can’t sit and wait for it to land in your lap Steph, unfortunately the world doesn’t work like that. Even in the most luckiest of scenarios you still need to put your head above the parapet!
Get out there and fight for your right to party….!
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Oi! That’s what I’m doing! OI!
Only the Beastie Boys saved you!
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Good old Beasties!
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My suggestion: prep doc listing steps for plan.
Maybe make a few that collate with each other so if one starts becoming nonviable, you can switch without issue.
Either that or just, you know, win the lotto.
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I have a standard plan.
But I like your idea of making a few, because things rarely go off without a hitch. And I need to prepare for those “what ifs.”
I’d love to win the lotto. Let’s make a deal. Either of us wins, we share!
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Also, I’d probably be headed straight to Oregon if I won. Because I wouldn’t need to make money in Seattle.
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Sharing? Nah.
I’d sink that money into RULING THE WORLD!
Actually would share it around as there are people I’d want to help and I’d be uncomfortable with that kind of cash.
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Yeah, no shit. That kind of money can only end up badly if kept entirely.
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Hmmm.
It can. It certainly can. Surely there are some out there who don’t bow down to its delicious, alluring nature of caress and embrace…
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Damn. That made me want to bow down to it. Fuck’s sake.
I think those who don’t bow down to it are those who give it away. Which takes us back to the beginning.
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I’m a little late to this party, and can’t think of any helpful advice off the top of my head, but my thoughts are with you during this crazy, stressful, and exciting time in your life! I’ve moved to different countries but never ACROSS a country before.
Too bad I don’t know anyone in Seattle who could help you out on the job front. If you were to move to Vancouver, BC, on the other hand, I could point you in the right direction.
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Damnit! Haha, just kidding.
Oh. My. Gosh. You know what just hit me?
THERE’S A CHICK UP HERE WHO’S FROM SEATTLE.
I should be smacking my forehead.
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I’ll smack it for ya.
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OK, I have moved about 234792 times….Five moves ago was THE LAST TIME I AM EVER EVER MOVING EVER. 🙂
My first piece of advice? GET RID OF EVERYTHING. Yard sale, maybe, or rent a booth at a flea market (often you can get a square for like $10) – unload that crap. Craigslist, even. Take some loot to a consignment store, or a person who can upload it to eBay to sell. (There are people who do this for a living.) It’s going to cost you more – both in $ and in emotional energy – to have this stuff vs unloading it. This means less storage cost, you may not have to hire movers, and a better chance that you can make ONE trip and get outta there. Plus, it’s easier to “move” a few times until you find your semi-permanent place to land if you’re not burdened with crapola.
If you can buy it at the dollar store, DO NOT PACK IT.
Second – the house. Talk to a 3rd party renting company and have them do a walk-through. I have my old property renting and it is zero maintenance for me. In my area, rentals are at a premium, so it’s very common to get more than the mortgage. Check into this option. Also, they can tell you what they’d recommend you do to get the place “ready.”
If you want to just unload it, talk to a realtor. Same dealio, s/he can do a walk-through and make recommendations.
(a fresh coat of paint, and a carpet cleaning, will do wonders to start, especially if it’s clean.)
If the house is empty, you won’t need to return to sign anything – your realtor can find someone local to assist and you can Skype the whole thing.
With the job – definitely be looking now. You never know when that dream job will pop up! However, it’s challenging to get interviews if you’re not local. If you know you can be there in a day or two to interview, either rent a PO Box or use a local friend’s address for your resume.
And you said you don’t want to do Exec Asst work….but good ones are hard to find, and landing a job in that area gives you cash in-hand – aka breathing room. Think of it as not forever – it’s part of the transition/move. It allows you to eat while you find THAT job you REALLY want.
I haven’t moved in like 3 years now….Excited for you (but glad it is not me, haha)
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Whoa woman, you just gave me shit tons of super practical advice. I’m sincerely thankful – this is freakin awesome!
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Oh good. Hit me up if you need resume help later 🙂
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Resume help?! Did you just offer me resume help?! WOOHOO. I just may take you up on that.
It’s a good resume. But I don’t know if it LOOKS good. If that makes sense.
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It does! I should do a post on What HR People Hate About Resumes.
What I’ll start with here –
Save your resume as a PDF to preserve formatting
Have one unformatted version that you can upload to online applications- you won’t like the look but it will save you a ton of time
Customize every resume to the job. EVERY ONE.
Got a fever today but more later if you need it 🙂
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Yes, that’s a valuable point right there. I had forgotten about customizing. And it’s no wonder I didn’t get the very first job I applied to. The next one, I customized and tailored it specific for that job. Dunno if I’ll get it – but I’m glad I finally remembered.
Never thought about saving as a PDF!!
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You’d be amazed how software butchers formatting….
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Holy geez sorry for the coffee-induced blommit up there….
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No sorries! I needed it!
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