I was going to write a post.
I was going to tell you all about the awesome four day weekend I had this weekend just past.
I was going to tell you about bookstores and masturdating and parks and recreation and old fucks and Buddha by the rhododendron and fishing and fiction.
But no.
No.
I can’t do that right now.
Because fuck me, that’s why.
I let the doc put me on geodon. It’s an antipsychotic. Hear me out. I had it on good authority that it could, in fact, help with the mixed episodes I’ve been experiencing a lot lately.
Problem is…turns out I’m allergic to the shit. Severely.
I’ve been throwing up for 2-3 days straight, no chaser. Seriously. I chased it with anti-vomityourgutsup juice, and I vomited the anti-vomityourgutsup juice out.
Big ass rash spreading across the back of my neck.
Bubbles on my arm (blister).
Dizziness and worsening headache.
Confusion. Randomly stopping myself mid-thought or even mid-sentence.
Itching.
Massive edema.
Fucking. (Yeah right. No such luck.)
Torn up guts.
Itching. Did I mention this COOKIEMONSTERFORSAKEN ITCHING?! MOTHERFUCK, I ITCH.I’d pay somebody to scratch my itch, but I think that’s called solicitation.
Anyway. The one thing it geodon DIDN’T fuck with, clearly, is my ragingly filthy mind. So there’s that. And also my cookiediction. Me want cookies. Now. (Also. May I borrow someone’s kids so I can “not” teach them this lesson by what is obviously The Real Cookie Monster, please stand up?)
The one thing I DIDN’T get as a side effect was the heart-racing arrhythmia. It’s a damn good thing, because if that box had gotten ticked, he was going to have to admit me. My heart was not only NOT racing, it was lower than he’s ever recorded it. 42. I think? OH MY GOD, MY HEART IS THE MEANING OF LIFE?! I KNEW IT!
Anyturtles. My GP said I met every single other criterion for the Rare and Severe reactions. Yay me!
A man once told me I was rare. Now I know what he meant. RARE AND SEVERE AND FUCKED UP.
I kid.
Mostly.
Except I don’t kid. You kid. Keep the kids over there. Because I’m MANGRY.
Because.
Because.
On top of forvomigen, the nausea med he gave me that doesn’t work, he also gave steroids. Lots and lots of steroids that I have to take for six fucking days.
He asked if I had any issue taking short-term steroids to stop my allergic responses and wipe out the rash. I said no, except Hulk. He was mildly puzzled, then laughed when I said YOU know….then I made rage face and said Hulk Angry! Only some of that actually happened. I’ll let you work it out.
So I’m on steroids for a week. And I’m sweating and angry and itching and sore. AND NOT FOR ANY OF THE FUN REASONS.
And I can’t make my brainhole focus on the things I WANTED to write about.
Fucking fuckstick douchecanoe handledick. Oooo handledick. New one. That works a myriad of ways, that one.
Anyway. I’m gonna fuck off outta here.
Just wanted to say Hi.
Just wanted to say I’m Pissed Off.
Just wanted to say I Miss You.
Just wanted to say Bye Fuckers, Because ME MANGRY.
Oh. And for what it’s worth? Either I was on one of my upswings already, or geodon was actually helping me. Because starting the drug coincided with the start of a major uptick in my moods and mindset. So. Let’s hope it wasn’t the geodon. Because now I’m pissed that I can’t take it anymore. WAAAAAAH. Look at me. Crying like a bitch. MANGRY.
P.S. If that mangry music isn’t your thing, mute it and watch. Because Sully Erna is in Fine Fucking Form here. Shirtless. Shoeless. Perfect jeans. Yum. You know what? I’ll take my steroids with a side of Sully. (Unfortunately, that’s the only good part of the video. The rest of it is wrestling or boxing or nascar or some other lame shit where grownass boys beat each other up for money.) (Hey, don’t start in on me! I told you I’m mangry! It’s in the title! FUCKING STEROIDS. GRAWR.) (But now I’m sleepy and itchy and mangry and hungry and sweaty and ARRGGGHHHHHHH I SAID GOOD DAY!)
P.S. Numberonius Twovicus. How about a preview of last weekend, hm?
What the hell is the thing in that picture???!!!
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That’s Cookie Monster dispensing wisdom to generations of impressionable children.
Thank you, Kind and Benevolent Cookie Monster.
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No, no, no, I mean the one showing something that looks like a piece of shit with spikes. Don’t tell me you used THAT for masturdation! OOOOUUUUCH!
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HAHAHA! Oh HIM! I forgot his name. It’ll come to me. No way in hell did I touch that little fucker. I learned my lesson the hard way with one of his ilk when I was a child. The venom that moves through those spikes and into you makes you go numb, stiff and swollen. Sounds like Viagra. Hmm. Wonder what that shit’s made of.
But isn’t he cool as fuck?! Badass little mofo.
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Steph. I laugh, but I know it’s frustrating. Love you! I hope things work out soon. 😊 ❤
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It will all be for the best in the end!
Oh my gosh, you’re in NOLA, right? Dude. Are you going to see Flight of the Conchords? I wanted to do JazzFest. I just couldn’t afford a damn hotel room for a whole weekend.
❤
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Oh Steph..the weather here has been so bad lately. It’s storming it’s ass off again tonight…Jazz fest is nothing but a deep, smelly, expensive mudhole. Lol.
😄no…no jazz fest for me.
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Ewwwww I didn’t even THINK about the impact of the weather. Shows how my brain is(n’t) working lately. But but Flight of the Conchords!
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Steph…mud puddles, mosquitoes, heat… $7 bottles of water.
No, Love. 😉
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No, no, no, hun. You misunderstand me. Flight of the Conchords will be at Saenger Theater on July 11. They still have tix available.
I know. I can’t even weather JazzFest for my peppers. No fucking way.
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Oh….ooohhhh…..oh…..ok….
..um…maybe?….
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FOTC has finally sold out! They still had tix earlier this week. But no one wanted to go with me. Story of my life. I’m going to Modest Mouse by myself next week. Fuck it! 🙂 Another masturDate.
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Lol. Goodnight, Steph. I gotta get to bed..tomorrow might be Friday..but it’s still a work day.
I hope you get some rest! All my best, Friend..♡
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But now I have a new reason to be mangry. No FOTC for me. Ah well. Need to save my money anyway.
Goodnight, Eric, and dream sweet dreams of flowers and sunshine and non-boggy NOLA streets.
Stay safe down there. I’m going to bed myself.
❤
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You had an encounter with one of THOSE when you were a child?!! Man, you had the most traumatic childhood of anyone I know!
Perhaps Queen Bitch could benefit from a close encounter with that badass little mofo!
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Yes, and I let it ride up my arm. And then it got me right where it bends. I couldn’t bend my arm for the rest of the day. He was orange and red and awesome and venomous and I didn’t know!
Oooooo I could drop this fella into her coffee, but I wouldn’t want to hurt him.
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Hehe I’m going to sleep. I’m literally smacking my cheeks to stay awake for chatties! Talk soon – I hope! ❤
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Bonne nuit, mon amie! ❤
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Et bonne nuit, mon amie! ❤
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Douchecanoe? Handledick? That med is doing wonders for your word creation skills. And what exactly does masturdation involve? Just curious. 🙂
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You know….dating yourself. Which may or may not involve bating yourself. See this is what happens when I’m up past bedtime. I get delirious and the filters fly away.
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Oh. Evidently, I used to masturdate a lot. And didn’t even know it. It’s often better than an actual date. And filters are way overrated. Don’t ya worry about that. 🙂
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I agree. It’s part of why I stay semi-anonymous here. So I can let it all hang out. Sometimes I surprise even myself, though. 😉
I’m new to masturdating. But I’m digging it. Last weekend movies and park and bookstore. I need to come up with something for this weekend. Perhaps another midday movie when it’s cheap because I’m a miser. Or the park to write some more. That was a treat. But next week, the concert! Then a pub crawl with a chick who invited me out with her girl crew. Panicking about it. But I’m gonna do it!
And I also have to go to sleep. Haha!
We can always chat more tomorrow if you’d like. 🙂
Goodnight, you son of a beach!
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Right back at ya, you masturdater! That doesn’t make you go blind….right? Holla! 🙂
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I’ll find out as I’m passing out. I’ve invited myself on a mini-date.
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Y’all have fun. 🙂
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HAHAHA! I see what you did there.
Goodnight, beachy.
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Awww…you are so kind-hearted. 😉
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He was a nice little fella, livin’ his life. I shared some time with him. Some of his life. And then I left him to his world and returned to mine.
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I think I’m skeered now!
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But I did learn douche canoe
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Hahaha! You ain’t skeered! Goodnight, woman!
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Lol! I hope your feel better now sweets. It’s fucking scary to have those damn allergic reactions
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It was REALLY scary. The steroids have me all jacked up, but the allergic reactions are finally abating. Still some nausea and such, but it’s dwindling more and more by the day!
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Oh I’m glad you’re better. Hope you feel better quick, love. There are people to cuss out and states to revile
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Thank you, Rita!
And isn’t that the truth.
There hasn’t been nearly enough cussin’ around here lately! Haha!
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I totally fucking agree with that shit 😜
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HAHAHAHA!
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Have a motherf&$ing great day, Steph
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Well thank you veryfuckingmuch, and I hope you have a fanfuckingtastic day yourdamself!
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See. This right here … Makes me love you (looking for an emoji with a middle finger) all the more😝
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HAHAHAHA! AHHH I needed this laughter this morning! Thank you!!!
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I’m here every Wednesday. Two shows on Friday. Tip your server 😝
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Oh, you like the tip, do ya? 😉
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Well for starters 😎
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Ah, like an appetizer. I get it. 😀
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Exactly!
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Let’s skip work and go spray paint people at the mall
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Oh my god, that would be FANTASTIC. Can we wear ski-masks and leg warmers?
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Yes. And those fucking ridiculous headbands that have bumblebee antennae on them
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I my god, we could be the Bumblebitch Bandits!
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Gimme ya honey, honey lest I sting ya
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HAHAHAHA! YES!
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Modern art baby – it takes true commitment 🐝
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Ondansetron. That’s my anti-nausea med. Little orange flavored tablets you let dissolve on your tongue. Works wonders during my bad migraine episodes; in slightly higher doses it may work for your vomitage. Never hurts to know your options.
I hope you feel better soon. ❤
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Thank you! And I’m always down for options – I really appreciate it!
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Oh, jeez. I had some antidepressant do that to me as a kid, and of course my family thought it was a good idea to let me start it on a road trip to Grandma’s so you can imagine what hell THAT was.
Hopefully the drug hell ends soon! I wish I had some advice for getting out of it but, despite my unnaturally long history with drugs gone wrong, hating life and getting mangry is about all I’ve got. /:
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Whew. I’m finally coming through it, but it’s been hell! Thank you, Drew. 🙂
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Welcome to the stupid reactions to medication group, where the medication you’re supposed to take makes you sick, and the meds you shouldn’t take regularly (benzos) are the only ones that help.
Our slogan is
‘Medicated for your protection only’
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God. I know. I’m sick of the meds already. I also know I’m back in the pit. Could be the med being gone. Could be me going way outside my introvert comfort zone Friday. Could be part of my rapid cycling. Definitely in a mixed fucking episode right now. Hyper and energetic, but mad. And also just want to crawl into the closet. Blows.
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Shits gonna be crazy for a little while coz med changes are a big thing. Just keep going, that’s all you can do
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Thank you, Kim. I figure she’ll throw something else at me Saturday. But I think I need it. I just hope I find the right combo soon.
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Oh my gawd! This is awful!!!
I have bipolar disorder and I take Lamictal, a mood stabilizer. It helps me with mood regulation. Have you tried this one?
I am so so sorry you are so sick. Aaaaghh. 😔😔😔
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Yeah, I was on Lamictal. And all seemed fine until she bumped me from 150 to 200mg. Then I reacted and HARD. So she had me stop it altogether. ARGH I dunno what to do.
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What were your side effects after you were bumped to the 200?
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Physically I developed a rash.
Mentally, I absolutely plummeted to right back where I was before I started seeking therapy. Worse, really. Not only did I resume suicidal ideation, but it was all consuming.
She told me it wasn’t the Lamictal…so I rode it out for a couple of weeks, and it just got worse and worse until she had me get off of it.
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Reblogged this on wwwpalfitness.
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Oh dear – that sounds like a terrible experience and I hope you feel better soon. K x
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Slowly but surely. THANK YOU!
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Damn.
I’ve been there. Several times. After being there several times, I’ve come to fear all new medication in a paranoid way.
Steroids and cookies go well together. Don’t forget to scratch up against some fitness equipment.
*pats hand*
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Hehe, thank you, Joey! I am terrified of any new meds now. I’m already sensitive to them, but this shit to it to a new level. I’ll keep trying, but I’ll be even more alert than ever!
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Sometimes trying a new med is like playing Russian Roulette.
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Yeah. And sometimes I’d rather just play the roulette.
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Yeah…
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That didn’t help, did it? I should ask how you are doing. How are you?
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Lol, it’s ok. I was merely agreeing that new meds can be a real pain in the ass.
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Yeah. Wonder what she’ll have in store for me Saturday. I can’t wait to get the hell outta dodge!
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Are YOU doing better now?
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No! 🙂
I’m trying. I really am.
Got some potential good news today, so I’m clinging to that for now.
And you know…thank you for asking.
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Boo. Hope you’re back to normal soon. And I definitely hope that he good news is real and keeps coming.
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Thank you!!
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I hereby offer my itching services, pro bono – phrasing – especially on all your pink parts. Was that too forward? Eh, who cares, the confusion from the psych meds will assure you’re forget this comment.
Feel better soon.
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I dunno how Mrs. Earp would feel about that. But hey. Still itching, so… 😛
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Whoo hoo! Oh, I just missed being the 69th comment. *giggles like Beavis and Butt-Head*
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Settle down, Beavis.
Or don’t.
It’s more fun if you don’t.
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that sucks about the medication. I don’t know what to say. Thanks for posting even if it is the last thing you feel like doing. xxx You are a tough cookie but remember to rest too xxx your health is number one to anything else- as you probably know already x
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Thank you, Daisy! Very very much!
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Ugh. That sucks so hard. Itching is the worst – even if you DO scratch, it. does. not. stop.
I’ve had good luck with steroids – they don’t make me rage, and surprisingly, they don’t make me hungry, either. But I’m a medical freak, too – cold medicines keep me awake and Ambien has zero impact on my sleep. So. Welcome? I guess? And feel better.
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Hahah! Damn, bodies are so strangely different.
Thank you, Katie. 🙂
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Holy fucking crap.
What to say.
Don’t scratch.
Don’t stress, try to calm and fill your face with as many cookies as you can if they make you feel good….
After all, the Cooke Monster tells you to…..
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Heh. You’re the best, Cameron.
IT’S SO FUCKING ITCHY.
GAHHHHH.
I want ice cream. That’s what my fatass needs. Ice cream. Followed by mm sushi!
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Well. I say go for it!. Enjoy a little of what you like…. plus Sushi is healthy… 😉
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Omnomnom
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🙂
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Haha, I’m not sure if this is appropriate but this post made me laugh… It’s probably not what you want to hear from me, seeing as laughing at someone who is MANGRY is like being entertained at someone else’s expense. But good word though. I’ve so far only heard of FUNGRY (Fucking Hungry) or FANGRY (Fucking Angry).
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FUNGRY and FANGRY! YAY! I approve! ANd it’s always appropriate to laugh around here. Makes my day knowing I may have helped someone laugh. So…thank you. 🙂
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